Frequently Asked Questions
What is Coaching?
Understanding what coaching is when you haven’t experienced it first-hand is challenging. It’s like trying to understand what the color red looks like when you’re color-blind. That being said, there are some things about it that can be explained.
Coaching borrows techniques from several other fields including therapy, consulting, sports coaching, and business. The goals of coaching vary wildly, but they generally consist of providing clients with direction, self understanding, structure, and effective strategies to promote a prosperous lifestyle.
A unique feature of coaching is that it strongly uses the Socratic Method. In other words, coaches use a set of techniques that focus on asking deep questions. The philosophy of coaching is that, while coaches are experts at facilitating and creating change, the clients will be experts on what changes will be beneficial and meaningful to them. In essence, the coaches goal is not to tell the client what to do. Instead, the coach gives the client the necessary tools and techniques to find and create their own answers to problems.
Another way of putting this is that coaches embrace the saying, “Give a man a fish, feed him for a day, teach a man to fish, feed him for a lifetime.” As coaches, we want our clients to be able to understand their own lives. We want them to be able to identify, what’s working, what’s not, what can be better, and how you make it better. We also don’t want to tell our clients what to do, because what works for us, may not work for them. Each client needs to find their own answers to how they live the best life possible.
How are you similar to or different from other coaches?
Like all coaches, I am trained in a specific set of skills necessary to empower clients. These skills include asking effective, empowering questions, goal setting, listening techniques, identifying emotional blocks, eliminating emotional blocks, and more.
The main way I may differ has to do with my orientation toward simplicity. Many coaches will focus on physical actions to move the client forward. For example, if a client is struggling with procrastination, an action-oriented coach might encourage the client to set up deadlines, reward systems, and schedules. In time, the client would hopefully learn to hold themselves accountable and no longer procrastinate.
In contrast, I tend to focus a lot more on what’s going on internally with a client. My belief is that, yes you can focus on strategies, systems, and schedules to address a problem, but this creates a lot of complexity and stress that tends to be counterproductive. Instead, we focus on what’s causing you to procrastinate.
Why is what you are doing, so hard and unpleasant? How can we shift your beliefs and values to align with what you are doing? How can we make it, so you are excited to do it? Overtime, clients learn what motivates and demotivates them to complete tasks. Then, they can use this knowledge make tasks effortless instead of a battle of wills.
I’m pretty happy and don’t have any problems. I don’t think I need a coach.
Many people misunderstand coaching and presume that you have to have a problem or be unhappy for a coach to be useful. While coaches are good at problem solving, what coaches really excel at is finding ways to make your life even better. Coaches are about getting your cake, eating it too, and then having all the extra icing and ice cream you could ever want on top of it. If you tell me that on a scale of 1 to 10, that your life is a 10 and absolutely amazing, I’ll just ask you how do we make it an 11.
So, to respond to this statement, I agree. If you are happy and don’t have problems, you probably don’t need a coach. Instead, you will want one, because coaches can make your life pretty damn awesome.
Why would I hire a coach to look at my life?
I’ve already thought out my problems to death, why would I hire a coach to do the same thing? This is a valid question many people ask. While it is possible for a coach to rehash old information, coaches tend to be good at providing a fresh perspective to a situation. Coaches are trained to take clients down new lines of thought they may have not previously investigated. In addition to this, coaches tend to specialize themselves to specific fields or issues, this means that while you may have your experience or the experience of a few people to reference, a coach will have the experience of every single client they’ve ever worked with.
I don’t have time for coaching.
Chances are you came to this site because of the fact that you don’t have time and you need to simplify.
If you say, you don’t have time for coaching, you are basically saying “I don’t have time to learn how to have more time”. Hopefully, that statement sounds as silly to you as it does to me.
If the fact that you are busy is pressuring you to not try coaching, recognize it’s an investment. You invest only an hour a week and in return you learn how to make the whole rest of your life less busy, hectic, and stressful. Personally, I think it’s a worthwhile investment, but that’s just me.
I don’t want to hire a coach because of….
Maybe you feel uncomfortable opening up to a stranger– maybe you don’t want to spend the money– maybe you feel like hiring a coach makes you a weak person– there are nearly an infinite number of excuses to not hire a coach. It’s important to recognize that hiring a coach implies that you will be making drastic changes to your life and with change comes a lot of fear. This leads to all sorts of excuses about why coaching would be bad for you.
Hiring a coach is a big commitment that many people are not ready for, but if you decide against it, it’s important you are choosing “no” for the right reasons. If you are not hiring a coach just because you are too busy or feel weird talking to a stranger, you are allowing a very trivial excuse prevent you from doing something that could really benefit you.
It actually takes strength to step beyond these emotional barriers. Just talking to a coach is actually a big step in personal growth. If you are coming up with several reasons to not hire a coach, I encourage you to think carefully and make sure you are making a real decision. Nothing saddens me more than seeing a prospective client back out because their fears got the better of them.
The first reason I focus on belief systems is that it works well with my natural strengths as a coach. I am very good at creating safe space in which clients can share anything without fear of judgment or rejection. I am also very good at identifying and explaining how a given belief may be influencing a person’s life.
The second reason I focus on belief systems is that they are the building blocks of life. Every action we take, conscious or not, is the result of our beliefs of the world. Beliefs are also our window to life. How we see our world is determined by our beliefs, just like how a glass can be called either half full or half empty.
Take the fact that beliefs affect both actions and perspective, and it can be said that beliefs almost create life itself.
Coaching works due to a number of factors:
- The coach always addresses the client in an inquisitive nature. As a coach, I always work with you to help us both develop a deep understanding of what makes you, you. This is particularly powerful when working with somebody who is reasonably bright and introspective. This delving into the understanding of a client’s nature creates a deep self awareness in the client, and often allows the client to gain more power in their life by making more conscious decisions.
- Effective coaches hold a diverse set of techniques to use with clients and are not commonly known by those outside the profession. Using even basic techniques, such as validation, goal setting, and clearing blocks is a tried and true method to keeping somebody on a path to success.
- Coaches devote their lives to understanding people and facilitating desired change in them. A lot of people can act as confidants to their friends and assist them in life’s regular on-goings, but rarely does this compare to the level of a coach who actively spends most of their time actively listening, learning, practicing, and studying to refine their craft to an incredibly efficient art form. It is through this in which a person can attain whole new levels of depth to their life.
For every coaching program, the focus is created by you, the client. While I specialize in issues related to being more intelligent than the average individual, often I wind up working with clients on a myriad of topics. Ultimately it is up to you to decide which aspects of your life you’d like to work on and develop. If you are not sure where you want to start, then our initial focus is to find that starting point.
People hire Heart’s Journey Coaching, because:
- They want to know what it’s like to get things done and have time to spare
- They want inner peace
- They want to understand themselves better
- They want more opportunities to enjoy life instead of zoom past it
- The want to experience the beauty of each moment
- Developing a better understanding of yourself
- Finding new sources of emotional fulfillment
- Holding a sense of peace with yourself and the world
- Discovering new and exciting experiences
- Learning new concepts for transforming both yourself and your outlook on the world
- Whatever you want to work on!
The structure of coaching can often be changed depending on both the coach’s and the client’s desires and needs.
Typically, most coaching is done entirely over the phone. Personally, I prefer Skype, which is a free program that allows users to speak face-to-face over the internet. This can be nice because the coaching will feel a little more personal and you can physically see the expressions of your coach.
The most common frequency and length of sessions is about four 45 to 60 minute sessions a month. This is often changed depending on the desires of the clients. Clients who really enjoy working with their coach and having a high level of accountability will often have longer and/or more frequent sessions. If a client has been working with me for a while, they will sometimes lower the frequency or length of their sessions because they have learned how to coach themselves through most issues.
Our first session will be kind of like a casual two-way interview. We will converse and ask each other questions to get to know each other. I will be mostly focusing on identifying what areas of your life you might want to improve and determining how much coaching would be able to help you. You will also get some exposure to coaching to see if the process is for you. Typically I make this first session free because most clients want to get a feel for coaching before they decide if it’s for them.